Crack Adventures
by CrepsleytheCreep
Summary: I had no better title... In the first episode, Firestar's Clan as two parties. The warriors and a few other cats won't let the rest of the Clan into their own party, so the apprentices host their own and invite everyone. Firestar is invited to both, but all he wants is to sleep. What is a leader to do?
1. Chapter 1

Hello, fans of cats in Clans!

I realize that my previous and only other Warriors fanfic was a bit, er, _short._ So here I am with another, longer one. And this time, it won't be a oneshot! :D

WARNING: Don't take this seriously in any way, shape or form.

If you hadn't realized this as a crack fic by seeing the title and/or description, then I'm telling you now that this IS, indeed, a crack fic... Unless I've lost my marbles. .

Here we go!

P.S. I don't know if I'll need constructive criticism. I'm writing this off the top of my head to cure the block that's in the way of the Path of Writers.

Enjoy.

ALSO, another warning. Most cats, if not all, are OOC here. So don't expect anyone to be sane.

* * *

Firestar woke up in his den in ThunderClan camp. It was midnight.

Suddenly, he remembered.

The warriors were having a rockin' toga party in their den, in celebration of the new warrior, Cheesynacho, and his sister Hotpocket.

The apprentices weren't invited, so they had decided to have a masquerade party in their own den, and invited the kits, queens and elders to join in.

Firestar, however, was keen on getting his beauty sleep.

Looking around groggily for a few seconds, he noticed that there was a special toga and a sparkly mask for each party in the corner of his den. Both parties must have hoped he'd come to their own.

Firestar hissed in annoyance. Even his own kits and mate had participated.

_If you can't stop them... Well, join them._

Firestar put on the toga, and hid the mask underneath so he could make his way to the other party later.

Firestar entered the Warriors' den. He was shocked at what he witnessed.

There was a disco ball and a dance floor, run by an extension cord running to who knows where. Greek style pillars stood at the entrance of the den and throughout the party(The Greek theme ended there), and cats with togas were eating various party-prey and dancing like no one was watching.

Firestar found his mate, Sandstorm, dancing (How do cats dance, exactly?) her arse off with Dustpelt and Ferncloud, and a whole other group of cats.

"Firestar!" Hotpocket came crashing into him. "Glad you could make it, ol' man!" Hotpocket grinned up at him as Cheesynacho came up beside his twin. "Try the cheesy nachos and hotpockets they made in our honor!"

Are you confused why there was such a big party for two new warriors? Yes?

The answer is simple. Cheesynacho and Hotpocket are the first cats to bring delicious Twoleg delicacies to the Clans, and now ThunderClan is exporting the products to the other Clans.

Firestar ate a hotpocket and a small bowl of nachos. Then he made his escape.

On his sneaky way out, he noticed some cats doing things that shouldn't be mentioned. He shook his head and darted out of the den.

He ditched his toga and put on the sparkly red mask. He adorned an elegant red suit, complete with mahogany tie and blood-red cuff links.

He entered the apprentice's den. It had looked MUCH smaller on the outside...

It had been completely transformed. There was a gorgeous tile floor and salmon-pink walls and a huge chandelier hanging from the roof. Cats danced a ballroom dance in circles, each with their own elegant costumes and masks.

Firestar found his kits wearing ballgowns and masks. (And found it odd that everyone somehow made clothes out of thin air.) Trying some of the snacks, he danced with his kits and snuck yet again out of the party.

Ripping off the sweaty suit, he made his way to his den and fell fast asleep.

* * *

In the morning, drunk cats from the toga party and exhausted cats from the ballroom party lay in nooks and crannies in the camp. Some rested out in the open, on the HighLedge and under other cats, whereas some cats were in the dirtplace and the dens, but no cat lay in its respective den.

Firestar shook his head. "It's going to be a long week," He sighed to himself.

* * *

DONE. BUT. This will have more chapters, if you like this kinda stuff. Review and tell me your opinions. Hope you enjoyed!


	2. Chapter 2

Hello! Here I am with another one.

Disclaimer: If you thought I owned Warriors, you're dead wrong, mate!

Also, Kris, thanks for the review- knew I could count on ya!

* * *

Firestar looked around the spooky forest. It was Hallow's Eve in the Clans' territory, and cats were going trick-or-treating. It was a great event where cats of all ages could collect candy from other clans.

How did that work?

Well, cats would start out in their own clans and collect candy from all the dens. At each den was bowls of candy from which cats would take some and move onto the next den. Then they'd travel off to the next Clan's camp and do the same. You see, Hallow's Eves at the Warrior camps were pretty organized.

On this particular night, Firestar and his best friend Graystripe got lost in the forest- but only because it was a moonless night. Of course, if they had some lights they would know exactly where to go, but they seemed to have wandered off their own territory and into nameless land. The forest stretched on for miles.

Graystripe's witch hat bobbed up and down. He beckoned his friend over to a metal Twoleg mesh. "This is called a _fence,_" he explained. "How 'bout we climb it and find our way home?"

"Alright- I think I've got a flashlight in my pumpkin bucket."

Holding their buckets in their mouths, they climbed the mesh and jumped down on the other side. Firestar gave a shake of his fur and his bee wings flapped. He flicked on his flashlight and shone it around.

After they'd walked for a while, Firestar asked, "Hey, Graystripe? I get the feeling we're... being watched..." he trailed off. Graystripe looked uneasy as well. Suddenly, they noticed something stuck to a tree.

"Always watches... No eyes." Graystripe read shakily off the piece of paper.

"Let's head back, Graystripe."

"No, we can't let this piece of Twoleg (censored) scare us. We have to get home and get lots of candy!" Graystripe looked on with (false) determination!

They trudged on, getting more and more desperate with each owl call and snapped twig. Then, by chance, Graystripe noticed another note taped to a tree. "Should we take it?"Firestar questioned nervously. But by then, Graystripe had already picked it up.

"Don't look or it takes you."

"Now I'm seriously scared, man." Graystripe said to Firestar, terrified.

Firestar's gaze wandered up the ridge. There, silhouetted against the moon, was a tall, Twoleg-like creature... Long spindly legs. Its arms went almost down to its ankles. But worst of all... Its face, or lack thereof, was a marbled gray substance, like skin. It came forward, like it was walking, but without moving its legs...

"R-run!" Graystripe shrieked shrilly. He and ThunderClan's leader bounded forward, but bumped into something a few fox-lengths away. Looking up, they met the "face" of the creature who seemed to be in pursuit of them. They wanted desperately to run, but its mesmerizing "gaze" stopped them somehow. Their ears rang.

In their minds a voice said, "Wait. You forgot your wallet."

"I... I did?" Firestar asked. I didn't even know I dropped it. It was tucked into the pocket of my bee costume..." He checked the pocket and, sure enough, there it was. "Uh, well, thanks."

"Don't mention it. I'm Slender. Some people called me Slendy!" The creature's cheekbones were now raised, giving the impression that it-he- was grinning cheerfully. "I'll teleport you back to your forest."

Five seconds later, Graystripe and Firestar were in their own forest. There was no sign of the Slender man.


End file.
